Depression is untrustworthy

This is a post I had meant to put out last month. Why I didn't is because I wasn't ready to face up to what I had dealt with in the month of November. Never the less here it is now.

Depression is like the evil adviser to your brain. Much like Brain from Pinky and the brain. It sits there, feeds you lies and manipulates you. You trust in it not because you believe it but, because it's coming from a place you've experienced again and again and again.

It' treads lightly and carefully. With surgeon precision it feeds you lies that are familiar and in the realm of possibility. But with most lies and ludicrous thoughts, should you declare them to the world, the world would notice in a heartbeat the lies you fed them and yourself. However when it exists only in your head, when you're the only one who can hear and feel it. Depression is a scratched up CD(or a looped youtube video for you youngins!) playing over the same section so many times that you begin to believe its a part of the song, which seem true and real.

Have an example, on the morning after my last day at work depression whispered "no one actually likes you. You are a failure, a loud mouth,  socially awkward, and an idiot who tries too hard to make people like you. They never wanted you here and that you don't belong here even on your best day.They believe you to be rather pathetic, and talk about you as soon as you're not in ears distance."

With that I consider that it's a possibility. "Yeah, that seems logical" and walk away from any and everyone related to it.

On the other hand depression gets full of itself every now and again. Sometimes it operates under a pretence that simply cannot be.

For me it was "no one finds you funny" and your girlfriend doesn't really love you.

This is what's called a game changing moment.

My girlfriend does love me. In fact she is rather smitten by me! (HA! used smitten in a blog!). And I'll have you know the old ladies in the park find me QUITE hilarious and have offered to buy me pretzels on more then one occasion!

Depression had lied to me and won. But then it tried to convince me of something that is beyond a shadow of a doubt a lie. Who I am and who I love is what made me recognize depression for what it was. I got out of bed. I brushed my teeth and began plans of world domination!!!!!! (Also known as writing script ideas for videos)

So to anyone dealing with depression and is convinced that there is no point to actually doing anything.
Remember that depression is untrustworthy.